So I totally identified with her post and started to think of some of the goofy things people say to me. Especially when you add two more kids and they're all different colors. So here is my list of
Silly Things People Say to Large Families Full of Kids That Don't Look Like Their Parents
Boy
you sure have you hands full!—I hear this uttered
EVERY.SINGLE.TIME I leave the house with my kids. I
know in your head it seems like a clever response to the overwhelming number of
kids you see squeezed into my shopping cart or crowded around my restaurant
table, but not so much.
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| Yes, it's a terrible picture and only includes 5 of my 6 kids, but it is so hard to get them all in one shot. |
You’re
a regular Brad and Angelina!—That is probably the
number 2 most often uttered comment. If
only I had the mansion, private drivers/cooks/housekeepers, etc, etc, of
Brangelina, life would be so much easier.
Alas, we’re just regular Brian and Carrie.
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| Look Mama, I can fly! I bet none of Brad and Angelina's kids can fly!!! |
Are
they twins? Triplets? Quadruplets?—Uh no! Is it because they’re all black? Look carefully people! They do not look that much alike. And they're all different shapes and sizes. And one of them is Chinese.
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| They look remarkably alike, don't you think? |
So
you have 5 boys and a girl?—NO NO NO! That Chinese
“boy” has earrings and ladybugs all over her shirt. And that little black “fella” also has
earrings and her shorts are pink! Go
ahead and stare a little bit longer before you ask that question.
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| These are GIRLS! |
Are
they all related?—Yes, they are all mine. No, they are not all biologically
related. This question doesn't really
offend me exactly, but just imagine if I walked up to a strange woman in the
grocery store and asked “So, do all you kids have the same father? Or did you
sleep around a lot?”
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| Oh Mama, that was a funny one! |
Are
they all yours? Are they US Citizens?—Yes, they are all mine,
all legally adopted and finalized. I
will not be returning any of them. And
yes, they are all US Citizens. No
illegal aliens in the bunch. I know it
bothers some people that we have adopted internationally, but that is
definitely a discussion for another blog post.
Do
you run a daycare?—OK, pretty often we dress all of our
kids in matching t-shirts. This is
simply a survival technique. It is much
easier to look for the six kids in matching shirts at the park than to try and
remember what each of them was wearing when we left the house.
Where
do you put them all? You must have a huge house?—Actually,
no. We have a very very small
house. Just over 1600 square feet. We have 3 bedrooms and 2 baths. There are triple bunk beds in each kids room. We used to have a dining room, but now it's my More Love Mama workshop. We used to have a garage, but now its filled with bicycles. There is not seating for all 8 of us in the living room. Anyone looking to downsize and wanna trade houses?
How
much did it cost? You must make a lot of
money to afford all those kids!--If we made a lot of money we'd probably live in a bigger house. I am a public school teacher in a non-union state. My husband stays home with the kids in part because it would cost more in daycare than he would make in salary. Yes, adoption is expensive, but so is owning a car made in the last 5 years, and I bet a lot of you have one of those. This is a very sensitive subject for most adoptive parents. I did not buy my kids. I paid a lot of fees to our government and to China and Congo. I paid lawyers, and translators, and airlines, and hotels, for the privilege of parenting my amazing children. But I did not buy my kids.
You
must be so patient!—Nope, not even close. I'm older and slower than most parents who have toddlers. I think that sort of makes me look more patient. But maybe I should just keep that one a secret.
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| OK, maybe I'm a little patient. |
